Currently: dumbfounded and bored.

No classes today, I loooooove UST! At first I thought there were no classes because it was raining super hard last night, but I guess I was bad at thinking of reasons why. Nevertheless, I don't know what I'm gonna do right now. I'm not in the mood yet to study (MATH AND THEO TOMORROW UGH) nor go outside because the sun is glowing super brightly (?). Bad choice of words, Denise. Hahaha. Anyway, I have other plans though. Maybe go to SM and buy fruits? Because I look so unhealthy. And then maybe shop, because shopping is self-rejuvination. Hahaha. I soooooo need that for tomorrow's exams.

Wish me luck! Cheers.

Happiness is a warm gun waiting to be triggered.

No classes tomorrow. I must be happy.

But then, I'm not! I'm totally wondering why. Guess I just hate the fact that I'm all alone for one day again.

Don't ever look back.

I AM SERIOUSLY MOVED BY THIS VIDEO.

Even though it just has the lyrics and the songs, and some gorgeous photos, I love it. I can't stop looking at it and watching it that it's on repeat already. I AM DISAPPOINT AND ENVY :(

And now, I'm quite imagining about my lovelife again, and studying all alone and lonely.

Let's go all the way tonight. No regrets, just love. We can dance until we die. You and I. We'll be young forever.

DSQUARED

OMIGOD, FABULOSO.

Sometimes in life.

...I just want to rest and think about what I want. Actually, I do that every night HEEHEE. What can I do? I'm in this point of my stressful life wherein I need things to make me happy. I have a lot in my wishlist. I am not going to enumerate it here, don't worry. Nor will I marry the one who gives it all to me. I'm just going to imagine it all in my hands, then I will be happy and inspired. Weird, I know. Sometimes I just imagine myself without this pre-med thingy, that I'm just hanging out at Starbucks dressed up like I'm going to a party. Sometimes, I imagine myself and my best friend that we're on a trip to Paris acting like Blair and Serena. Sometimes I imagine myself with a guy, and we're being happy with each other. I'd never expect those things to come along, but I do wish (except for the first one, ha ha ha.) for them to come true. I WANT TO RELAX. I'm just in my first year here and I'm already stressed. Unfair, because other first years like me aren't experiencing this. I'm away from my family, away from home, away from friends and close to books. I'm also almost considering my Zoology book as my boyfriend, WELL hopefully I will not. Sometimes I think that I show no point at all. I just love to think about things that will never happen to me. Because what I want, I can never have. I just have to save up for it, still I can never have it.

Bottomline: I AM STRESSED.

I HATE THIS FEELING.

I seriously hate it. I don't know what's going on with me, but it's definitely loneliness. Or karma, but hopefully not. :|

Now, I'm undergoing stress. All kinds of it. Because of my studies (?) or other things. I have kind of accepted it at first because I have no other choice, since I want to take up MedTech here @ UST from the very start. I'm just plain confused on what's happening to me right now. I'm still learning to love it, I just can't describe how lonely I am while studying, memorizing ions, solving math problems, and such. One time I texted all my friends, "I miss you guys", it did help... short-term help. And then there was this surprise text (and also call) from this guy. Which I liked for about two years ago. I don't know, but it gave me a sudden inspirations. But now again I'm lonely since I know it's make-up and pretend. But of course, hopefully not. What's so painful about this is, you're already setting up for your future. I truly believe that God has lined up someone for me, and I am just impatient to see him already. But that fact that I need him the most right now, God still doesn't want me to see him. Unfairrrrrrr. So, I'm learning the virtue of patience.

And now, I am in the midst of memorizing 106 ions, a LOT of formulas, and also a lot of scientist. First time in my life that I have been sleeping at 12am onwards. BAD BODY CLOCK. I swear to myself, I WILL SLEEP AFTER THE EXAMS. If not, I could be dead already. BASTA! I need need need need need need need inspiration.

Newest addiction.

Saranghae~ >

I'll miss us talking about forever.

It's actually the end, and it's actually finally the end of my high school life. It was about one and a half week ago but usually I'd talk about it later or super later on. I will miss everything about my school (yuck, not everything pala), batchmates, friends, Narra, even the teachers (a few of them). I'm glad I have survived four years here because if not, I don't know where else I'll be. I've experienced a lot of things here, most of them bad. Hahahaha kidding aside, I learned to become mature at all things, bad or good. I've taken things in a positive way unless it's really the worst thing ever to come to my life, hahaha. I started out as an innocent little girl and in a span of a few years I grew up like I could already live my own life. Surprising, but that's really how it gets. And after a few years I'm hoping to be a doctor, get married, and have a wonderful life with my family and friends. I don't usually talk about my future in of people but I guess it's time to open it up, since I'm gonna be a college student soon which will take the way to my career.

But, so many more kwentos about high school are to be kept inside my heart. All, as in all. I don't remember every little thing (OF COURSE) but I surely have experienced forgetting it and then remembering it all again. Hopefully, my friends can do that too. If not, then I should be in a superhero movie or something. I just wanna thank them for all the support they've given me, whether I was sad or not, they were there. I can truly say that I've trusted a lot of people and have given me good feedbacks, Wow, sounded like a product or something. Hahaha. And now as we're going in different ways, I wish them all the best. Maybe in a few months or years, we'll be talking about how hard college life is and how desperate we are to go back to high school. But for now we just have to move on with our lives because we can't be stuck here forever. We're just gonna keep moving on until we see each other again. And when we see each other again, we're gonna gossip. HAHAHA. I'm gonna miss you guys, and I swear I'm gonna text each and every one of you until my fingers sore.

Now I'm listening to every emotional song on my iPod, and all I can think about is him. I don't care where in the world he is right now, but I just wanna say one thing: take care. We're gonna be on the same place soon and I'm expecting we'd be seeing each other everyday, but we still haven't cleaned up the mess yet. I'm hoping we could, soon. Whenever we're both ready, and I hope we could be. AY drama.

Anyway, thank you Batch '06/Class '10. You made me a new person, better or worse. Thank you, and I hope to see you soon with babies in hand. Hahaha kidding! I love you all, and I will miss you all. Good luck in college. :)>

Cheers,

Denise

????

OH MY FRIGGIN GOD. I cannot hella believe I can still remember my email-password combination for this blog, and I cannot wait to blog again this summer. A lil' bit of emotion burst huh. Well, thanks to my trusty slow laptop, I can still type! How fun. This is gonna be a fun, fun summer. More fun - I am finally graduating! After four years of high school, I'm still alive. I cannot believe this. Wow, I can't believe a lot of things. Hahaha.

And so, ciao.